Collection Of Fifty-Five Hilarious Memes And Tweets

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andcallmeshirley
Jan 4, 2020 3:08 AM EST

A prime selection of funnies that'll put a smile on your face. And here are even more funny memes to keep your spirits high.

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  • 01
    Organism - Max Miller @RuinMyWeek My girlfriend wanted a special cake for her 30th birthday. Something fancy. I suggested one in the shape of our dog, which she actually considered because we are unhealthily obsessed with him, but we thought that might be over the top... So this is what we ended up with. Happey Skylar 12:05 PM · 12/29/19 · Twitter for iPhone
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 02
    Organism - e4moji @e4moji What if medieval artists were actually really talented and that's just how things looked back then? win Dela Haure del Cletaiy 1:31 PM · 12/30/19 · Twitter Web App
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 03
    Property - Think my Chinese is a little under cooked.
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 04
    Yellow - slug @generalslug what else is there to say but lemon pig 4:20 PM · 12/30/19 · Twitter for iPhone
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 05
    Text - Orli Matlow @HireMelmFunny Baby Yoda implies the existence of a Sporty Yoda, Scary Yoda, Ginger Yoda, and Posh Yoda 9:32 PM · 12/29/19 · Twitter for iPhone
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 06
    Text - HEEEHAW НЕЕ @ComradTwitty If I had a genie and that genie told me the only thing I couldn't wish for was unlimited wishes I would first wish my genie wasnt such a punk-ass loser and my second wish would be for unlimited wishes. 1:17 PM · 12/30/19 · Twitter for Android
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 07
    Text - Talk To The Hatter, @Talk_To_The_Hat Oh, WebMD...you're so helpful... l. AT&T 4G 7:51 AM 100% WebMD Question 2 of 2 Back Trembling associated with ... Answers Continue diabetes cocaine use cannibalism in Papua New Guinea
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 08
    Text - not brendan @crocodilethumbs 2019 having NYE on a Tuesday is the most 2019 thing ever 5:39 AM · 12/30/19 · Twitter for iPhone
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 09
    Text - Sharon Stone @sharonstone I went on the @bumble dating sight and they closed my account. Some users reported that it couldn't possibly be me! Hey @bumble, is being me exclusionary ? Don't shut me out of the hive u 9:38 PM · 12/29/19 · Twitter for iPhone 8,392 Retweets 98.6K Likes Sharon Stone O @sharonstone · 18h You've been blocked We're committed to keeping Bumble safe, which means we have to enforce certain rules when our values are violated. Your account has been blocked because we've
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 10
    Text - Harmless Venomous Anal plate Dual row of scales after anal plate Single row of scales after anal plate a-giant-spider i dunno about you guys but if i'm not sure if a snake is venomous or not i don't think my first step would be to grab & examine its ass
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 11
    Text - cal? @cal_gif The horniest thing l've ever witnessed but not been a part of was when my really hot TA freshman year told the class his biggest turn on was screaming and every single girl and a few guys immediately screamed 4:10 PM - 12/30/19 · Twitter for iPhone
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 12
    Pug - SAM Justin 34 o LET ME PLAY WITH YOUR HAIR WHILE WE WATCH THE OFFICE.
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 13
    Text - Mandy, More @adorkablymandy I'm not trying to hurt you but totally love pineapple on my pizza... And I dip it in Ranch... 4:17 PM · 12/30/19 · Twitter for iPhone
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 14
    Text - Amanda Marcotte | Mediocre Mommy @storiesofamom Welp. Another day, another year, another decade where neither Ellen Degeneres, Ty Pennington or Publishers Clearing House didn't show up at my house to change my life. 3:29 PM · 12/30/19 · Twitter for iPhone
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 15
    Triangle - What is the dotted line called? The elder wand
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 16
    Text - the drake gatsby 8 @DrakeGatsby I've got 11 lava lamps and every time a girl comes back to my place, she leaves almost immediately. I need more. 14 lava lamps. 4:56 PM · 12/30/19 · Twitter for iPhone
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 17
    Text - Adam Aston @adamgreattweet EY'S ANATONT Me: Do you know where the kombucha is? Kroger Employee: I don't know what that is, is that a sauce? 2:09 PM · 12/30/19 · Twitter for iPhone
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 18
    Text - Arianna Bradford @TheNYAMProject Devil: Welcome to Hell. Do you know why you're here? Me: Um... D: Seriously? M: ... D: Arianna, you told your kids they couldn't have brownie dough because it would give them salmonella and then you ate that shit with your hands after they left. M: AND ID DO IT AGAIN 3:01 PM · 12/30/19 · Twitter for iPhone
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 19
    Face - Pimples? Zero efrncs Zero Blackheads? My awareness that these are two different ZERO women
    via Reddit
  • 20
    Text - ErinEph @ErinEph It's crazy to me how people's reactions to raccoons in their yard is like "get outta here, raccoons!" What a gift of an opportunity to hang out with your own cute li'l bandit gang. 2:56 PM · 12/30/19 · Twitter Web App
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 21
    Text - evianescence @callmeEvian Life hack: Anytime you're tired of being put on hold with a company, just schedule a #2 bathroom break and guarantee you'll have the rep on the phone ASAP. 2:45 PM · 12/30/19 · Twitter for iPhone
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 22
    Yoda - Me holding my cat in the mirror saying "that's you" @keeping up_with naters
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 23
    Text - Jen Lap @jenlapcomedy Dating apps? No thanks, if I wanted to talk to someone for hours and accomplish nothing, l'd contact tech support.
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 24
    Text - Rhyming Mama @sarabellab123 For 2020 my resolution is to finally take the polish off from my September pedicure. Maybe I'm reaching 7:06 PM · 12/30/19 · Twitter for iPhone
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 25
    Organism - When you're scared to confess to crush so you do it in Minecraft enchantment table 20:27 T :JIL ||J== I love you too Did you just understand me?
    via Reddit
  • 26
    Text - Simone @SimoneSpringer One more day till I'm not lying when I say I'm in my 20's ... 20's the 20s same thing. 7:56 PM · 12/30/19 · Twitter for iPhone
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 27
    Text - caleb @calebsaysthings love reading about men in history like "unfortunately, he never found a wife : ( his elaborate scarf collection sold for $1.2M in 2011. he and his closest male friend, Chauncey, with whom he shared a bed, died within weeks of one another. they were known for their dinner parties." 12:33 PM · 12/30/19 · Twitter Web App
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 28
    Text - Ashley the Abominable Snow Monste... @AshToTheFuture I feel like my 401k end of year statement might as well say "aw, good for you, honey. At least you're trying." 6:39 PM · 12/30/19 · Twitter for Android
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 29
    Text - your other mom @difficultpatty Sex is cool, but have you ever completed a big puzzle? 12:12 PM · 12/30/19 · Twitter for iPhone
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 30
    Organism - me: i don't need to write it down, I'll remember "enter password" me: @Myjesusjam
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 31
    Font - Kids before video games 1958: Kids when they first played Pong in 1958:
    via Reddit
  • 32
    Text - Roxi Horror @roxiqt As a kid, I had to wear a brace because of scoliosis. I was also bullied a lot. In 6th grade, a kid said he was gonna punch me. I said "Okay, punch me in the stomach." He broke 3 fingers on my steel brace & got suspended. I laughed until I cried. He never bothered me again. 6:02 PM · 12/29/19 · Twitter Web App
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 33
    Text - Stephanie Sparkles @SSparklesDaily It's amazing what a hug, some belly laughs, and a good sleep can do for the soul. 10:03 AM · 12/30/19 · Twitter for Android
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 34
    Cartoon - 365 opportunities What will the new year bring us?
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 35
    Text - EdelBrice O @StranDadAbroad You think you've reached your limit and then your kid pulls out a harmonica. 10:40 AM · 12/30/19 · Twitter for iPhone
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 36
    Text - Mandy, More @adorkablymandy My sister: "Mandy, come on a 10 mile run with me" Me: "like, following behind you in my car?" Sister: "no... Well I guess you could do the bike along side me" Me: "what l'm hearing is you want me to follow you in the comfort of my cushioned, heated, radio blaring car..." 10:04 AM · 12/30/19 · Twitter for iPhone
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 37
    Text - The Dad THE DAD @thedad The "in sickness and in health" part of the marriage vows was made up by men because we can tell how much everyone hates us when we have colds 2:59 PM · 12/30/19 · Buffer
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 38
    Text - p HereHoldMyBeer p @flyaway_k Omg I thought I was having a day, this just happened to my son at work. I gotta get him on twittere he fucking slays me! Idk where he gets it from. (Yeah, he gave me permission O ) I was commando Zack> Long story short, my Today 8:07 PM manager who was putting soup bowls away literally saw my asshole I had THE most embarrassing thing in my whole fucking life happen to me today Zack > Utoh what Dad they fucking exploded Okay so I have these nice black slacks t
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 39
    Text - Zack > Today 8:07 PM T had THE most embarrassing thing in my whole fucking life happen to me today Utoh what Okay so I have these nice black slacks that are a little tight but they fit me nice Anyways I was knelt down picking up some soup bowls today and they literally exploded off of my body iMessage Pay
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 40
    Text - Zack > It's laundry day I was commando Long story short, my manager who was putting soup bowls away literally saw my asshole Omg I can't breath I had to drive back to my house and change pants and then GO BACK They split? iMessage Pay
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 41
    Text - Zack Dad they fucking exploded They were literally assless chaps when I got home Everybody at least saw cheek Kelly though Kelly looked inside of me
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 42
    Text - Vision Bored @VisionBored1 I'm sorry if you don't like that I'm wearing grey wool socks with a red stripe at the top in my nudes but l'm Canadian and it's cold 11:19 AM - 11/19/19 · Twitter for iPhone
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 43
    Text - Momtribevibe @momtribevibe 2020 is the year I fold my worries into paper airplanes & turn them into flying fucks. 11:22 AM · 12/30/19 · Twitter for Android
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 44
    Food - oray dennys No one said the waffle keyboard was more efficient nor, say, even worked. It just feels good. Really, really good. vehlikaclearskyes why is dennys telling me to finger breakfast food
    via Reddit
  • 45
    Text - Michael Does Tweet @Home_Halfway Does anyone remember the name of that one Dolly Parton song that goes, "Jolene, Jolene, Jolene Joleeeenneee?" 10:56 AM · 12/30/19 · Twitter for Android
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 46
    Text - lilsamsquanch @lilsamsquanch66 The lady who works at the gym tossed out a "that's it?" As I was leaving like cmon
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 47
    Text - amber ruffin @ambermruffin 9:30 Breakfast 12:30 Lunch 2:30 - 730 A constant, immeasurable flow of increasingly horrible snacks 8:00 Dinner
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 48
    Text - A Hogmanay-themed Grumpwitch @grumpwitch At what point do I confess to my supervisor that l've been bumping up the due dates all month so that nobody needs to come in to the library between Christmas and New Year to return books? 1:31 AM · 12/27/19 · Twitter for Android
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 49
    Clothing - So, I have a friend who has a new boss. We secretly call him Voldemort. I made this and gave it to her for Christmas (it's a toilet paper cover). It's taking on a life of its own! She sends me pictures everyday of him in a different place. Like a grown up Elf on a Shelf! Jase Crervo Cfrerno You know POO! You know You зе
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 50
    Text - James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn @XplodingUnicorn 5-year-old: What are you doing? Me: Working. 5: Why? Me: I have to. 5: That's a dumb reason.
    via Funny Random Meme Dump
  • 51
    Metropolitan area - Rijksoverheid • 3 days ago North Korea is that country that's in Early access beta 150 VIEW 5 REPLIES
    via Reddit
  • 52
    Nail - @lilgotitties Full set JaySantana @JaySantana24s I've never seen toes that need braces
    via Reddit
  • 53
    Text - That the Boomer doesn't realize the museum in question has an app that teaches the history of all the works in the museum because they can't afford staff members to teach people anymore due to budget cuts since museums are a "waste of taxpayer money" according to Boomers. Bette Midler O @BetteMidler 1d What's wrong with this picture?
    via Reddit
  • 54
    Text - mjalti i have this unnerving fear that i'm gonna meet keanu reeves in some tight elevator and his eyes are going to burn into my soul as he tells me the secrets of this universe then bites me on the neck to give me immortality so he's not alone anymore C kristenbellspenis Keanu if you're listening l'm not a little bitch like OP come get a taste Source: mjalti 182,814 notes
    via Reddit
  • 55
    Text - r/TumblrInAction Posted by u/Deutschkat • 3h • i.redd.it Thank God you're not a doctor and FYI: "obese" is a slur even if a doctor/medical professional uses it. their degree doesn't stop it from being a slur; it just gives them the "authority" to use it without consequence. "obese" is a slur. debate no one, because that's what it is. 4:58 PM · Dec 23, 2019 · Twitter for iPhone 1 2.6k Share 129 BEST COMMENTS - kyste • Go go Power Genders ! • 3h No. Just no. Obese is a clinical term. "Disgu
    via Reddit

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